Just a quick word …
Being on the mend means there’s not much energy left to muse. I’m looking forward to this shifting soon. It’s awful to feel stifled.
I’m recovering from the debilitating effects of adrenal fatigue, and as I nurture myself back to health an important part of my “therapy” is spending quality time with my beautiful Bear.
As I heal, my connection to Bear grows stronger, clearer and more buoyant. Instead of the dread and debilitating anxiety I was feeling a year ago while in the saddle, I’m feeling a new confidence and a sense of elation. Bear reflects to me how I’m doing. Feeling how relaxed and happy he is with me helps me to know I’m on the right track.
On the days when I must yield to an adrenal meltdown it’s thoughts of Bear that keep me grounded. Because frankly, sometimes while sitting on the edge of my bed for hours at a time with a migraine and waiting for the nausea and vomiting to pass, I just want to end it.
Maybe a bit dramatic, but there you go.
I don’t know how long it’ll take for my adrenal function to stabilize. I’m working with a doctor, a naturopath, a chiropractor and a therapist to sort this through. But it’s getting so the good days are really good, and the bad days I’m learning to manage.
And besides, I tend to look at it this way … at least I know what I’m dealing with and am taking the necessary steps to heal. It does mean I’ve had to reduce my activity level. I rest a lot and have de-stressed my life as much as I can. My priorities have changed and my focus must be on getting well so I can fulfill my creative, and other, dreams.
The road to recovery may be a bumpy one, but at least I’m on it. And, as much as I nurture my horse in reality he also nurtures me.
Nurture what you love …
Happy New Year!